In clear defiance of their reservation being declared off limits by the Department of Fish and Wildlife the elders of the Gilbert Crick Indians tribe have resurfaced. It appears they have intentions of reclaiming their home land.
Law enforcement responded and were reportedly: "Viciously scratched by blackberry vine traps" and pelted with "waterskippers."
The leader of them appears to be one P, AKA She-who-pees-in-the-bushes.
Eyewitness accounts report: "She is awfully damn fast for an old fat woman."
All afternoon City officials have been getting reports of children coming home with soaked shoes, sandy socks and smiles on their faces.