Wednesday, February 5, 2014

damn it Jim....

******************* TRIGGER FOR SIV INJURY- GRAFFIC PHOTO *******************  ********************************************************************************

I sat down here to blog then, got sucked into reading my own blog...I'm such a goober. I mean I LIVED all this, and I WROTE all this and still it sucks me in! lol.

Teachers striking, kids out of school, Have a dozen 1/2 done blogs and I'm wasting time re-reading my own stuff.

Can I just say, DAMN I AM A GOOD WRITER! Bwahahahaha! Yup,  I am my own biggest fan. Even if no one else reads my stuff, I am enjoying the heck out of it.

I had an appointment to see the nurse on the 6th that had to be rescheduled. The office called Tuesday to move the appt. I must have sounded not okay because they called me back today to check on me and see if I need to be worked into the schedule sooner.

I find this interesting.

Because in all these years  of me telling various doctors that I am a self injurer and that I am struggling etc... they have mostly blown me off.

But after seeing me two months ago with this on my arm....

They no longer blow me off.

I don't know whether to be relieved that they care about my safety...of appalled that I'm such a freak I warrant special attention.

But, it is sure nice to have a medical team that cares about me, and has actually heard my cries and helped me to get enough relief that I can stay safe.

This injury prompted them to put me on the buspar. Which I am THRILLED to report is still working for me and has helped me more then I can every say.

48 years of fighting my head was enough. Its nice to have some relief.

My arm is all healed now. I am taking extra good care of myself because post big injuries I am very prone to do sequel injuries for no reason.

Life is feeling pretty good right now for me. Which in the past would trigger my Pre-traumatic-stress-disorder. However with the buspar, its not, thus allowing me to simply enjoy living, without waiting for the rug to get jerked out from under me.

...and, that is amazing.

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