Monday, December 1, 2014

the last light out

Working nights all those years, I got to see something that goes unnoticed by most people. Each year, around this time, the dark night would suddenly be lite up with the first of the Christmas lights. A breath taking moment when the darkness gave way to magic.

One, then two then three the little colored lights would spread like chicken pox from house to house till the night was ablaze with color.

Then in January they slowly would blink off. The bright night slowly getting darker and darker as people turned the lights off for the season.

There was always one hold out. The last ones to finally turn them off, and return the night to darkness.

That night would always make me cry, something about it just leaving me with a profound sadness.

Well the lights went out early for me this year.

November 26, 2014, CMS died. She is the mother of the farm child KSS I have mentioned on here so often. She was 13 when I met her. I was 17. We were just children.

I was incredibly blessed to be allowed to be apart of her family. To watch her grow up, and become a mother herself. To be trusted with the one thing she loved above all others, her daughter KSS.

CMS was a genuinely nice person. So sweet and kind and gentle. She had her own light that dazzled everyone. Beyond her beauty, was a heart of gold.

She didn't deserve any of the hardships that plagued her body. She didn't do anything to anyone to deserve that kind of pain. I want to kick God in the balls and angrily demand why he allowed that much pain to hurt her.

She had the most peaceful smile. It radiated with the calmness she seemed to always have. She was just a bright little soul who sparkled. I am so lucky to have known her and enjoyed her company for the last 31 years.

I went looking for pictures of us after I heard the news. A search that revealed only two pictures.

How do you know someone 31 years and only have two pictures of you together?

Simply, because I was always behind the camera taking the pictures. Never realizing that shots of us together would some day not be possible.

CMS left the world a better place. Not many of us can claim that. In her short life she passed on her inner light to this sweet child.

Who grew up to be this spectacular light. 
Who reflects her mothers good heart, kindness and beauty, and will continue on blessing the world as much as her mother did.
I am so glad. So glad. That my life's journey took me to a path that we could walk together for a spell. She will be missed indeed.

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