Friday, February 1, 2013

Vault of pain

Work has me in an endless spin cycle that has me exhausted and so tired.

 Finally got the nerve up to do the biopsy on the two lumps in my boob. Oh yes I will post about that another day.

 LOL (like I needed another excuse to post pictures of my boobs on my blog! *snerk*)

Got the results back....Benign.  Lots of  thoughts to write and chew on, just no time.

Wondering if you all can handle another "lets gut P's psyche post"....or if I should just not even get into that whole story. Its one that I have never told anyone.

It starts with Betty Ford and her breast and how that single breast changed my life.

My head, right now, is off. I don't think its the usual winter depression type stuff. I believe its from the lowered thyroid dose I am on. I feel hypothyroid and when I dip into that area on my lab work I get a

When I am off, wow, can my mind barf up some powerfully horrific stuff. Combine that with what I am capable of doing with my writing, I can inflict bruises on your soul.

I don't want to inject my personal pain into anyone. I don't want to hurt anyone.

And....then there is the part of me that says WHY NOT? Why not share the darkness? I am not alone in having a vault of pain in my head. Maybe by sharing it it will help another find comfort and courage to face their own demons.

What do I get out of it?

A good cry, plus it helps me to take back my power.

What do you get out of it?

That I don't know. But you must get something, or else you wouldn't keep returning here right? or is it more along the lines of gawking at an accident? LOL.


  1. Replies
    1. I know, so why do I feel so bad? Hey listen... I'm suffering Blogzilly withdrawls, post something...even your grocery list.

  2. Very glad to hear they were benign as well!