weather forecast: 100% chance of fog

I started the generic thyroid medication on June 5th. We are now 20 day in.

I have given it a fair shake and been trying to keep a positive view of this ....cause its going to be a YEAR or more on this blasted generic before the brand name comes back. But 2 1/2 weeks in I can tell you...this is NOT going to be a very pleasant trip.

This isn't like Twinkies and merely waiting for them to make a come back. This is a vital hormone that is KEEPING ME ALIVE.

We already know from two previous trials if my labs are even slightly in/on the low end of the normal scale I get @&^@%$%^ PSYCHOTIC.

I need to call tomorrow and request that labs be drawn to see where I am. But its only been 20 days, it will not show up that soon on the lab work.

I. am. so. bleeping. tired. of. this.

Biggest mistake I have ever made in my life was undergoing the RAI. I did it to be alive longer so my children/Husband could have me around. But this isn't living, this is akin to being a zombie.

The brain fog is creeping in.

My affect is flat and dusty. I feel mentally like a paper doll.

I have some stuff I wanted to blog about...(insert frown face). I have it written down so when I am feeling better I can add it.

Yesterday marked a mile stone in my career and I really wanted to blog it. I have worked 30 years in long term care.

I can't even think of an emotion let alone write with any emotion. bummer.

but on the bright side I am well rested and unstressed and relaxed, and that is making this a wee bit easier cause all that I am fighting now is my thyroid and not all the other stuff in my life.

bee-larrph!

please stand by....our program has been interrupted by sub-clinical hypothyroidism....we will return when we find where the heck my brain has gone in all this fog.