Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Man over board!

I reach over the boat edge and grab you by your collar and bring your face above the surface.

You spit water in my face as you sputter and growl. "let me drown."

I jerk you hard and whap your face against the side of the boat. Then dunk you back under.

You come up swinging and cursing.

"Stop swimming down." I growl at you.

I feel your body give up the fight in it, and grow heavy in my hands. You bob there silently taking fast deep heavy breaths that slowly slow down until you are calm.

"I failed." you at last say.

"failed?" I echo.

"Failed at being a grown up, failed at my job as parent, spouse...human name it all of it." you lean back in silent agony, eyes closing with a lifeless sigh.

......and it stops there. This was in my "draft" folder for my blog. I remember who I was writing this for, but not what prompted me to set fingers to keys. There is a certain level of inner pain in another person that will vibrate in my soul and make me reach into this space within my self and reach out to try to help.

Often I write stories that I hope the one who needs to see it will read themselves into it. Some times I address them out right. And in this case, sometimes my words end up unspoken.

I wish I could find a way to tap into this part of my writing and force it. I find it engaging and almost hypnotic at the speed it draws you in and connects with you  I have a rogue writer within, that has a soul with endless compassion and empathy.

Quite the contrast to the monstrous angry part of me that writes the dark stuff.

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