Wednesday, November 28, 2012

The oval mirror

* * * * Triggery for childhood sexual abuse, read with caution * * * *

The oval mirror

Once upon a time there was a beautiful oval mirror.

It hung in a little girls room, just upstairs and to the left.

The little girl loved to stare into it's flawless surface and see her reflection.

She would stick out her tounge and make funny faces and the mirror would laugh and make a face back.

They were very good friends. The mirror watching all that happened in the room.

One peaceful evening, as the mirror reflected moonlight onto her sleeping face,

there was a noise on the stairs.

An awful frightening noise.

It woke the girl.

"Mirror the monster with the flesh knife is coming!" she cried and hid under the blankets.

The mirror swung into action and began to sway to and fro.

As the monster got to the door and turned the knob, the mirror threw itself across the door.

There was a horrible sound as the monster swung open the door and knocked the mirror down.
The monster stepped in and with no regard for the mirror stepped right on its face and shattered it.

The girl felt her soul shatter as she faced the monster alone.

She was left to the dark as the mirror no longer reflected the moonlight.

The mirror layed for a very long time on the floor, years and years.

No one cleaned up the broken glass or even noticed it at all. No one.

That was until one summer day when the little girl, now older, ran into the room and fummed
around fighting anger and hate and feeling as if she was going to explode.

She threw herself to the floor and looked at her reflection in the mirror.

"TELL ME WHY!" She angerly demanded. "WHY??"

She focused on the mirror and noticed for the first time, it reflected many different images...
many different faces, some whole, some fragemented, some not there at all.

As her vision slid from face to face, she got cut on the sharp edges. The pain was comforting and calming.

"I see there are many of me now."

and she didn't look in the mirror again.

And the mirror once again laid for a very long time on the floor...years and years.
For the most part the mirror just closed its eyes and tuned out the world.

It was only vaguely aware of being slid into a box and transported to a new place and shoved under the bed down the hall to the right.
The girl, now grown, never looked at it.


The monster reappeared.

The child, now a woman, saw a blinking light on the message machine and touching it was
unsuspectingly ambushed by the monster.

The woman, now a child, was very afraid. Even the monsters disembodied voice was too powerful to fight.

She hurried down the hall to the right and yanked the box from under the box from under the bed.

She tore open the dusty box and spoke to the mirror for the first time in forever.

" did you have the strength to try and stop him from coming in my door all those years ago?"

"I knew it would take all of me to block the door, not just the hook or the frame or my glass." sobbed the mirror.

"You did it as one" the woman said quietly. "How can I do that? I am many now.

But the monster speaks and I am five years old. One five year old is not able to face the monster."

"No, no five year old should be sent to face the monster. Why doesn't someone inside you that is older pick her up and put her on their shoulder? " said the mirror, "like this"

The mirror pulled a smaller sliver of itself closer to a bigger piece. "see, now the monster will see a bigger you."

The girl, suddenly taller, looked carefully at the mirror and saw she was indeed bigger.

"and say if we pull these two pieces here and here for support then we can build a human pyramid and hold her even higher."

"Oh yes and if they were flanked by this piece and that piece then the base is strong and wide and stable."

The girl drew up her shoulders as she felt her power flowing back into her. She kept carefully reassembling the mirror until it was whole again.

Though the image was not perfect and had many scars, it none the less reflected her image as one again.

She stared for a long time at this stranger she had not seen for so long.

"Hello you" she at last spoke to her reflection.

"hello you" the reflection answered.

They smiled a quiet smirky smile at each other. The woman felt the mirrors frame fuse to her, giving her a solid sturdy support structure.

The mirror spoke again. "Dont send a five year old to fight the monster alone."

"Who shall I send?" she asked.

"You send the army you see before you."

The woman stood up and came to attention. Presenting a brisk salute she pivoted and went to the phone.
With a single movement she hit DELETE.

The monsters voice was gone.

She picked up the phone and dialed no longer afraid, her army knew how to silence the monsters voice.
And they could choose to do so at anytime.

...and the oval mirror?

well it hangs in a beautiful womans room.

Where you can see it everyday.


(c) 6-3-2005 PR

1 comment:

  1. You truly get it Soltari. This was as beautiful as it was haunting. It was healing even as it hurt. Powerful.